A Puritan View on Sex

One of the conservative arguments against gay marriage that has resurfaced lately is that sex is designed to procreate. In many ways it's a catholic view as they don't even support birth control because babies will come if it's God's will. But largely the American ethic of sexuality has come from the puritans. Don't believe me? Ask your local historian and they'll tell you Puritans have deeply shaped our values.

So I was surprised when I came across this following quote from the book "Body Theology" by James Nelson

"It appeared to them that God's fundamental purpose in creating us as sexual beings was not that we might make babies, but that we might make love. It was love, intimacy, mutuality, not procreation, that were central to the divine intention for sexuality. Some Puritans, for example, declared that if children were born to a marriage, that was an 'added blessing,' but not the central purpose of the marriage."

Any time we say things are for sure (ie. i'm sure my view of Scripture is correct) we usually end up being wrong. I have known that the sexual ethic most conservatives espouse today does not have the historical backing they would like it to. Afterall, when was the last time you saw a 20-something conservative waiting for sex until marriage so that they can start making babies? No, most of them are having sex before marriage because they're in love and attracted to their mate. It's a cop out to say procreation is a prerequisit for or the purpose of sex.

Critical Thinking

As I prep for my college classes next week one of the courses I will be teaching is about critical thinking. Learning the material has stretched and challenged me. I'm afraid it's going to be a boring class as the material is rather dry. But what else do you expect from a philosophy class?

As I've gotten into the textbook for the course I've been reminded of much and put words to ideas I had but could never articulate. I feel like understanding critical thinking is crucial for any activist. I especially liked the chapter on persuasion. Take any hot button issue and people at both sides just end up yelling at each other. Those aren't the type of people we need to be reaching. Because the two sides are so opposed and generally come from different worldviews thus arguments one side makes will not make sense to the other side. The graphic below was one of the ones from the book talking about moving people up the mountain in their conversion from one point of view to another. As activists, I believe we have to recognize and celebrate the baby steps. Getting someone who is completely opposed to homosexuality in every way, shape, and form to question their understandings and views is a success. See the graphic below for more examples.


I also like that each topic covered in the critical thinking course has common traps related to the topic. For example in the chapter on persuasion the various types of fallacies and arguments people use to persuade are listed and explained:

foot in the door
door in the face
lowballing
investing time
appeal to pity
appeal to fear
appeal to pride
Ad Hominem argument
fallacy of Tu Quoque
straw man argument
withholding quantification
ignoring the question
red herring

I wish I had time to summarize them all but you should just read the book (its also linked to the left in my "currently reading" section.

I am convinced homosexuality can be righteous in the eyes of God. As such I need to do my part to make sure my arguments are solid and not full of illogical techniques (which I often hear from both sides). Once my argument is solid I feel that I have an advantage over many other gay activists because I come from the fundamentalist/evangelical mindset. I understand how they think and their arguments. This better enables me to relate to them. And that is also why I am glad to see gay rights organizations finally including minorities and people of faith in their activities. My quarterly "Equality" magazine came this past week and it was full of articles on people of color and faith. Perhaps we're learning...

The Haps

I haven't had much to say lately. It must be the new job and life transition and getting ready to teach some college courses. Getting settled in and moving. The big news is that I submitted my forms to get pre-approved for a house loan! Hopefully things pan out and in the next few months I can start looking for a place to call my own!

I was able to connect with some old friends over the July 4th holiday which was wonderful and affirming. I am loved. I need to remember that though there are the voices who always find a way to tell me how horrible I am. Those are people i've purged from my life and am thankful their voices don't hold the weight they used to.

This Michael Jackson phenomenon is quite interesting. It shows how much our modern media is more entertainment than news. And how easily distracted a majority of Americans are. There are 2 wars going on. North Korea is threatening to blow up Hawaii. Iran is rioting. Honduras had a coupe. Police in Texas raided a gay bar and assaulted the patrons... and people want to hear about Michael Jackson. I liked his music. God bless the guy but he was a weirdo.

Lest I make a post without sharing how I'm trying to change the world, today marks the second time this week I will participate in an interview for a graduate student doing research on GLBT issues. The first one was a masters thesis, this one is a PhD dissertation. Sharing my experience helps me to feel like i'm in some way informing research and helping others to understand. Plus having done two masters degree's I understand how hard it can be to get participants for research. I had planned to attend Camp Courage but it got canceled and will be rescheduled. Its a boot camp to train and equip activists from a grassroots perspective. In looking over the material alot of it I already know but there is always something to learn or do better!

Congrats to my friends Joe Moderate and Marriage: growing day by day who got married last weekend... this time legally in Iowa! I attended their quaker religious wedding ceremony last summer but now atleast a state recognizes it! May their relationship be blessed and an example to others of how wonderful a same-sex relationship can be!

Holidays

4th of July is one of my favorite holidays. I love fireworks and celebrating the birth of this great country. It seems this past year i've spent a lot of time criticizing the direction this country is going and I don't think our new president is capable or has the experience needed to help us. But on this holiday I stop to reflect on how wonderful our country is. And how noble its purposes once were. I think about the men who gave so much and how lazy we've become as a nation. I attended a baseball game with fireworks and a flyover from two fighter jets. And then yesterday I went to a big party down near the bay.

I've also started my new job. I don't know how the work will be yet. I think its going to be a big learning curve but the people in the office are great. They laugh alot which I appriciate! I also found out that I passed the comprehensive exams I took last month which means I'm really officially done with my second masters degree! It's been a good week/weekend!

I read the story below and wanted to pass it along in honor of our founding fathers:

EDIT: It appears I was caught not doing my HW - http://www.snopes.com/history/american/pricepaid.asp

Have you ever wondered what happened to the 56 men who signed the Declaration of Independence?

Five signers were captured by the British as traitors, and tortured before they died.

Twelve had their homes ransacked and burned. Two lost their sons serving in the Revolutionary Army; another had two sons captured.

Nine of the 56 fought and died from wounds or hardships of the Revolutionary War.

They signed and they pledged their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor.

What kind of men were they?

Twenty-four were lawyers and jurists. Eleven were merchants, nine were farmers and large plantation owners; men of means, well educated, but they signed the Declaration of Independence knowing full well that the penalty would be death if they were captured.

Carter Braxton of Virginia, a wealthy planter and trader, saw his ships swept from the seas by the British Navy. He sold his home and properties to pay his debts, and died in rags.

Thomas McKeam was so hounded by the British that he was forced to move his family almost constantly. He served in the Congress without pay, and his family was kept in hiding. His possessions were taken from him, and poverty was his reward.

Vandals or soldiers looted the properties of Dillery, Hall, Clymer, Walton, Gwinnett, Heyward, Ruttledge, and Middleton.

At the battle of Yorktown, Thomas Nelson, Jr., noted that the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson home for his headquarters. He quietly urged General George Washington to open fire. The home was destroyed, and Nelson died bankrupt.

Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed. The enemy jailed his wife, and she died within a few months.

John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she was dying. Their 13 children fled for their lives. His fields and his gristmill were laid to waste. For more than a year he lived in forests
and caves, returning home to find his wife dead and his children vanished. So, take a few minutes while enjoying your 4th of July holiday and silently thank these patriots. It's not much to ask for the price they paid. Remember: freedom is never free!

The Announcement

I alluded to an announcement coming before I left for vacation. I have other things I want to blog about but I want to share my exciting news:

I found a new job!

I'll be working at an independent study charter school in Northern California! It's a really interesting situation as they saw my varied work experience and decided to create a unique job just for me. Part of the time I'll be working in their main office (which is located in a beautiful town!). What that means is I will be helping with standardized testing and the CA high school exit exam as well as making sure the assessments our teachers are collecting meet state standards. Its a role normally reserved for administrators. So it will be great experience for my resume!

The other part of the job will be as an independent study teacher. I'll have a case load of students who I will meet with on a regular basis at their houses. I will assess them and plan out their path of study and make sure they're keeping on track with standards. Though it is not classroom experience it really gets my hands wet in many different aspects of k-12 education! I think because of my credential I'll be working with 7-12 grades. A positive to this position is I'll get to work from home half the time and my schedule will be super flexible which means I'll get to continue my in class teaching at a local university where I'm a professor at night! (speaking of, I havent taught at the university since my mentorship in the winter but in the next few weeks I start teaching a comparative religions class and a critical thinking course! They will be my first solo courses.)

The drawback is that this first year I won't be able to coach football because the office part of the job is 9-5 and there is alot of training the first few months. I'm hoping by next year I'll have things figured out where I can be back on the field. But another plus is the pay is better than I thought it would be! When I add to that my upcoming classes at Univ of Phoenix and being a part of the state retirement system for teachers, I'm gonna be set! This also means if plans work out as I hope they do, I'll be looking for a house to buy this fall!

News has spread among the departments I work with at the state university that I'll be leaving in July and I've already gotten a handful of emails wishing me well and saying I'll be missed. This was a position I was only supposed to have for 3 months but God has provided it for this entire year. I've gotten great experience and met some wonderful people. And I now know what it is to not live in fear that who I am will cost me my job.

Brian Mclaren on Sexuality

Brian Mclaren is a big name in postmodern Christian ciricles. He is a best selling author and speaker and pastor. I dare to say he has great influence over many people (such as myself) who identify as emergent Christians.

Yesterday during the massive Synchroblogging effort Brian posted some pretty honest thoughts on sexuality. It is the most favorable he has ever come out for GLBT people of faith. And the justification he shares is refreshing. I have heard it before but it is not a popular response yet. Still, I think it vibes more inline with the heart of Scripture. And I think as GLBT Christians gain more voice this is the direction we should go as we dialogue with those who oppose us.

While people have vigorously and sometimes viciously debated isolated verses in
Leviticus, Romans, and 1 Corinthians (versus which, I explain in the book, may
have very little or nothing to do with contemporary understandings of sexual
orientation) ... Acts 8 was waiting with a story that is more powerful than many
have realized.

Read his entire blog post HERE.

Bridging the Gap Synchroblog

My post today is part of a larger initiative of more than 60 bloggers all sharing their thoughts on how to ‘bridge the gap’. You can check out the other links at: http://btgproject.blogspot.com/ The purpose of this synchroblog is to share positive stories, ideas, suggestions on how we can bridge the gaps between people on the topic of faith and sexuality. Another way to put it is, “How can we embody mutual honor and respect in our conversations and relationships with those with whom we may disagree on the topic of homosexuality?”

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I don't pretend to be the smartest or most influential person writing in today's synchroblog on how to bridge the gap between people of faith and people of minority sexualities. I don't even pretend to bring any new ideas to the table. But I am honored to be a part of this groundbreaking event and feel that my life experience has at least partially qualified me wrestle with such a difficult topic.

In one of my previous masters degree courses we talked about the necessity of democratic dialogue in order to make democracy work as it should. These principles included respect, listening, equality (meaning that all must be considered equal during the discussion) etc. Instead what we have today is two polarized sides which yell across the divide at each other and very few people willing to meet in the middle.

Both sides are to blame for this. Though I certainly side more with those of minority sexualities who feel picked on and have to fight to be recognized and obtain equal rights. And when it comes to the untrue things GLBT people say I mostly feel sad that they don't know the Jesus I do. But I hear rhetoric on both sides. Perhaps that is why to help bridge the gap, Gay Christians need to take a more prominent role. We understand both sides and if those sides would sit and listen to someone who understands both points of view, I believe some ignorance would melt away and many would come to see the other side as human rather than as evil.

There are already organizations like the Gay Christian Network which enables people who think homosexual acts are right and people who think that homosexual acts are wrong, to coexist and get along. Sure there are disagreements and points of contention but it works! And there are organizations like New Direction which lost support and took much criticism for forging a new way of discussing this issue. Their name is truly fitting! And then as I just posted this week, there is an emerging body of research that supports the idea that GLBT people have spiritual lives. Someday people have to see that human beings aren't so different after all. When a Christian pollster such as George Barna undertakes such a big study, you know there is progress being made!

Here's what we do know: GLBT people are going to continue to gain rights and recognitions. But laws do not change hearts. Christians can kick and scream the whole way or like they have done with other social issues in the past (slavery, women, technology etc.) they can seriously talk about these issues. Hold meetings. Invite those with differing perspectives to the table. And GLBT people need to choose to love even those who would seek to deny them civil rights. They must learn to lead by example.

There are no easy answers. But experience and time shows us that when people actually know someone from "the other side" their views soften and change. This is why the TV show 30 days is such a wonderful concept and why the people leave the show changed. It's much harder to vilify someone you know! So maybe my only real insight to add to this synchroblog is that people from both sides need to be WILLING to dialogue. Once they are willing, the rest just falls into place. I put the responsibility of getting this started on Christians (both gay and straight). Followers of Christ are to be held to a higher standard. They are called to radical love. Not love that has dialogue to convert someone but love that desires to put the other person first. That's the love that fertilizes the ground for true democratic dialogue.